If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough – Meister Eckhart
Gratitude is the one practice we should all strive to develop and live by every moment of our lives. Once we start looking at life through the magical lens of gratitude, the real beauty of life starts to unfold. Our focus shifts from our problems to our joys. The realization that we already have all that we need to be happy, starts to set in. It is certainly a blissful way to live. But what does it really mean to live with gratitude? How does one incorporate this into a daily practice? How do we learn to feel gratitude?
For me, my experience with gratitude began on one specific journey. At the age of ten, I, a little girl from a small village, got on an airplane with my mom and brother to join my father in a faraway land. Everything from the plane flying through the whimsical clouds, the sight of the enormous oceans, the huge city sprawls, and the flow and order in which our universe moved definitely left a permanent stamp of gratitude on my soul.
But, it wasn’t until many years later when our children were young that I actually reached out to gratitude as a daily practice. It is certainly difficult raising children in scarcity but it can also be challenging to raise grounded children in a culture of materialistic abundance. With a bombardment of ads, peer pressures, and accessible, huge toys stores how do you teach children that they have enough? How do you teach them that all this is not necessary to be happy? How do you teach them to appreciate all that money can not buy?
I was constantly soul searching for the answers. I read as many magazine articles as I could get my hands on. It was the only easily accessible information available in those days and all I had time to read. Eventually, the answer came to me loud and clear. Children need to focus on and learn to appreciate what they have. They need to feel good about what they are blessed with. So in our home, we started the practice of counting 5 things we were grateful for every day before bed. Each day we decided to add one new thing to our practice. When challenged to find something new, the mind starts to focus on all the small, precious joys of life. It certainly helped my children become conscious of their blessings. But more importantly, it helped me focus and appreciate so much more in my own life.
Years later while reading The Secret by Rhonda Byrne (if you haven’t read it, I would strongly recommend it), I had what Oprah would call an “Aha” moment. In this book, while discussing gratitude, Lee Brower talks about keeping a rock in his pocket. Every time he touched this rock he had to think of something in his life he was grateful for. While, I didn’t put a rock in my pocket, I certainly had the realization that gratitude doesn’t have to be left for the end of the day! Why couldn’t one live with gratitude?
No, I am not overly optimistic. I know life happens, it’s not always fair, it’s not always pleasant and it’s often not what we anticipated. But it is precisely at these moments that we need to focus on all that is right in our lives. We must learn to appreciate all that we are blessed with. This appreciation helps us change our focus and therefore our perspective.
Often, minor things upset us. We fall into the cultural trap of constantly finding things to complain about. Over time our minds get cluttered and actually start to believe that our lives are terrible. When we are faced with real problems that need clarity and vision we don’t have it. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
How many of us are guilty of being upset when we are in a traffic jam? Impatiently, watching the snail pace of the traffic; constantly looking at our watch; getting upset and angry; we curse everyone and everything around us. (Not to mention our rising blood pressure and all the unkind things we are doing to our own bodies). Now imagine instead of trying to control that which is not in our control, we focus on controlling our reaction to the situation. What if we were able to accept the situation as is. If we shift our focus to the fact that we are sitting in a very comfortable vehicle, protected from natural elements, may be able to listen to some great music. If someone is at home waiting for us, how lucky are we to have that someone? It’s just a matter of focus, isn’t it?
The most challenging, yet the most rewarding situation is when we get into an argument or are upset with a loved one. These are the people that bring so much joy, love, and laughter into our lives. Yet when we are upset our egotistic mind only focuses on what they are saying and how they are hurting us. What if we changed our focus and remembered all the things we love about them and how wonderful they make us feel majority of the time? Once this becomes a habit, try to focus on the goodness of this person right in the middle of an argument! Magic!! (That point you were trying to prove can be addressed during calmer times).
For those moments when life truly feels unfair and tough, isn’t it a blessing that we are alive? That pulse, that heartbeat, that breath we often take for granted is still going. We have another chance, another day to learn and grow, to right our wrongs.
Life is a true blessing full of little joys, so let’s find them and focus on them through gratitude!
I would love to hear how you practice gratitude in your life and how it has made a difference for you.
With Love,
Devinder ❤️
Published in the Canadian Immigrant March 13, 2018
27 Comments
Maninder Grewal
Aha moment for me after reading this wonderful life experience on gratitude. I am going to instill this in my day to day life. Giving thanks makes people more resilient. Thank you!
DM
Aww.. I am so glad. Thank you so much Maninder! You are absolutely right about gratitude making us resilient. Look forward to hearing about your journey with daily gratitude practice. Love..DM
Pushpinder Grewal
Very well said! It’s all about shifting our focus but we forget to practice this on daily basis. Thank you for putting out everything in such an effective yet simple way!
DM
I am so glad you enjoyed it Pushpinder. Absolutely, it just takes awareness and practice. Keeping a rock in our pocket might not be a bad idea. Excited to hear about your daily practice. Let me know how it goes!
Pammi
Thank you Devinder! I opened this message when I totally needed it! Literally in the moment. It’s all about choosing how to react – that’s in our control & remembering the goodness of the person. Counting my blessings?
DM
How wonderful! The universe certainly has a way of sending exactly what we need and when we need it. We just need to be open to it. So grateful to have you read my very first post. Looking forward to your future feed back. Sending my love..DM
Annie
Very well said and weaved yes gratitude is one thing that makes sense of the past and brings peace to the today and creates s focus going forward. The best thing about gratitude is that it is the best way to create awareness and be present. Thank yuh fir sharing. Stay blessed
DM
Thank you so much Annie. You are so right, gratitude not only brings joy to every moment but brings peace and awareness into our lives. Love always…DM
Jessie Hundal
Congratulations on making the big leap in the Blog world.
Fabulous Fifty Five is a great initiative to share your thoughts about the experiences along the journey of your life. It’s always a pleasure talking to you and hearing inspirational stories. You are truly an amazing role model.
Practicing Gratitude: I’ve always kept a notebook/diary of some sort (sticker book, autograph book, journal et al) from as far as i can remember and i find once in a while the Three-Good-Things Exercise very beneficial, not only in that particular moment or day but also when you reflect back on the year counting your blessings. Over time, it becomes your gratitude journal in a way.
Three Good Things Exercise:
Why did this good thing happen?
What does this mean to you?
How can you have more of this good thing in the future?
Looking forward to the many fabulous ideas that are in the making.
Happy blogging =)
DM
Thank you so much Jessie for your love and support.
I love the Three Good Things Exercise. Always so much fun to go back and read these journals. Its a great way to reflect on all that is beautiful in our lives. I look forward to us all sharing amazing ideas together on this platform. So excited!!
With Love-DM
Rami
Thank you for this Devinder! I am going to practice this on a daily basis! It’s about how one chooses to view ongoing situations that cross their path . Simply having a more postive outlook can make a world of difference. Very well written!
DM
I am so glad you are commiting to the daily practice Rami. Its definitely all in the perspective one choose to take.
Looking forward to hearing about your journey. Wishing you much love and happiness always..DM
Inderjit Mangat
Very well said, all depends how we view things. Happiness is an inside job. There are many great lessons we all learn from life that have a great impact in our life.
DM
Thanks Inderjit! Absolutely, it all begins with the right perspective. Life teaches us many lessons and practice of gratitude never lets us down. Your support is so appreciated..
Love..DM
Gurjinder
This is absolutely marvellous Devinder. I love women who follow are inspirational to others. That is always a gratitude of selfless giving. Keep it up!
DM
Thank you so much Gurjinder. Your support means a lot. Together we can achieve so much more.
Love..DM
Stephanie Saul
Congratulations Devinder on your blog! Inspiring words of gratitude.
DM
Thank you Stephanie. Glad you enjoyed it.
Love DM
Varinder Bal (Veenu)
Beautifully written!
Gratitude is the attitude of continuous thankfulness. It is the backbone of all that is virtuous and good. Only when we feel the deep sense of gratitude, is when we truly learn to be optimistic, resilient, thoughtful, kind, adaptable and happy from within.
Keep up your good work Aunty. I would love to read more blogs from you.
Varinder Bal (Veenu)
Beautifully written Aunty! Great work.
Practicing gratitude is the most powerful practice. I started it as an exercise and finally over the years have been able to do it more effortlessly.
It’s the most beautiful state for your mind and heart to be in. It is the strongest positive emotion.
I read your blog a little while ago, in my scrubs, while waiting for a premature baby to be born in the OR. You reminded me of all the goodness and abundance that fills my life. You made me experience my strongest positive emotion again. Thank you!
PS: ? is healthy and parents are happy 🙂
DM
Thank you so much Veenu! So very glad you enjoyed the article. You are so right the more we practice it the easier it becomes and pretty soon it just become a part of our being! That is a blissful existence! Love your story of OR. Wishing this baby a beautiful life ahead. I look forward to your continues feed back.
With love..DM
Harjot Dhaliwal
Great post Aunty. Thanks for sharing your wisdom. It lends a helping hand coming from a warm heart. Just what I needed to read at this point in my life.
DM
Thank you so much Harjot! It means so much to have you read and find value in this! So very grateful ??!
Khush dhami
Thanks, Devinder beautiful words. We should love ourselves and try to what’s right for u happiness is in yourself u just have to find it try to do good things and be proud of yourself .i don’t want other people to decide who I am. I want to decide that for myself
Thank you. Well done!
DM
Thank you. I am so glad you enjoyed the read. Yes, you are right we have to find what makes us happy. It is our journey and we have to make the most of it. I look forward to your feedback.
Sarah Garden
I agree, being thankful for all of our blessings is so important. It helps us maintain the right frame of mind, it takes focus off of ourselves, and it helps to keep our lives in perspective.
Devinder Maan
Absolutely. Thank you so much Sarah for taking the time to read the post.